Goodbye Uganda

Today is my last full day here in Uganda. So these are just 2 prayers that I have prayed through frequently here and I’m sure I will continue to pray through even once I’m home.

Take some time to meditate on them.

“O God, I have tasted Thy goodness, and it has both satisfied me and made me thirsty for more. I am painfully conscious of my need for further grace. I am ashamed of my lack of desire. O God, the triune God, I want to want Thee; I long to be filled with longing; I thirst to be made more thirsty still. Show me Thy glory, I pray Thee, so that I may know Thee indeed. Begin in mercy a new work of love within me. Say to my soul, “Rise up my love, my fair one, and come away.” Then give me grace to rise and follow Thee up from this misty lowland where I have wandered so long.” -A.W. Tozer “The Pursuit of God” 

“Jesus, I need to give myself up. I am not strong enough to love you and walk with you on my own. I can’t do it, and I need you. I need you deeply and desperately. I believe you are worth it, that you are better than anything else I could have in this life or the next. I want you. And when I don’t, I want to want you. Be all in me. Take all of me. Have your way with me.” –Francis Chan “Crazy Love”

Stay tuned for updates on more ways you can get involved in what God has been doing here in Uganda and also in Kenya and Papua New Guinea. The Lord has been doing tremendous things in the past few months and has brought many new children into our path, whom we have in faith taken in. Now we must respond by giving freely as He leads each of us to. Please be praying about this opportunity to serve the Lord.

Are we really the church?

This morning as I read through Acts 2, I was amazed at the picture painted of the church and how it functioned, especially in response to what had just happened at Pentecost, following Jesus’ ascension.   I would encourage you to read through all of chapter 2, but since I know that might not be realistic for you to do as you are reading this, I will give a quick summary of what happens prior to the last 6 verses. 

Peter speaks at Pentecost and presents the gospel to all the people before him. The message of the gospel was more offensive than ever as Peter tells the people about the coming of Jesus which was prophesied about since King David and then Peter tells them “Let the house of Israel therefore know for certain that God has made him both Lord and Christ, this Jesus whom you crucified.” These people had literally just crucified their Messiah, but the disciples did not compromise the message of the gospel or refrain from preaching the gospel in its full force, truth, beauty, and offensiveness. Just as a side note, I wonder how many times you and I have shared the gospel with people, and felt uncomfortable by the harshness and severity of the gospel and either compromised or considered softening the message of the gospel so that the audience, whoever it might be, would be more receptive to hearing about Jesus. I pray that God would rebuke me ever so quickly if I take his good news into my own hands and in doing so, strip the gospel of its truth and power. After the disciples spoke the full truth of the gospel, the Holy Spirit, now resting upon them, stirred the hearts of the people listening, and verse 37 says that “they were cut to the heart.” The Holy Spirit did the convicting, once the apostles were faithful to deliver the message of Jesus and verse 41 tells us that 3,000 souls were saved!

The next part, verses 42-47, is incredible and depicts the church’s response to Pentecost and the 3,000 souls that were saved that day. I cannot summarize these verses as they are so beautiful and powerful, and I want you to be blessed by the words too, so here they are:

“And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and the fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers. And awe came upon every soul, and many wonders and signs were being done through the apostles. And all who believed were together and had all things in common. And they were selling their possessions and belongings and distributing the proceeds to all, as any had need. And day by day, attending the temple together and breaking bread in their homes, they received their food with glad and generous hearts, praising God and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to their number day by day those who were being saved.” Acts 2:42-47

The church, the body of Christ, simply did what Jesus did. They acted in the way that he had led them. They devoted themselves to meeting together and eating together, both in the temple and in their homes.  They were physically together and united in one mind and spirit. They were removed from their possessions in that they did not cling to what they had, but they freely gave to all who had need. Their hearts were glad and generous as they praised God- and they also had favor with all the people. The Lord added to their number daily those who were being saved.

WOW! What a picture- a beautiful picture of what the church should look like functioning together.  And when that happened, the Christians were joyful, the outsiders had favor with them and people were being saved daily…

No wonder the church has the reputation it does today. Truthfully, aren’t we often the opposite of what that passage depicts? O how we grieve our Father’s heart when we do not function how he intended us to.

Lord, please bring us back to you and establish this desire in our hearts. May we meditate on scripture, imitate the way you lived, and follow the model set forth for us in this passage. Help us Lord to be your body, for we are far from it.

Faith in Action

              On Saturday we (the team that was here for a week, the interns, and our Sozo kids and staff) went to Jinja, where the source of the Nile is. It was my second time going there, but it was still breathtakingly beautiful.  We went to Bujagali Falls too which was so awesome. When I see the rapids and hear the raging water I cannot help but marvel at God’s power displayed in creation. As if all of that wasn’t spectacular enough, I had the awesome privilege of witnessing God’s power at work in his children’s lives. While at the falls, we walked to a place where the water was calm and baptized 11 people, 8 of whom were Sozo kids who had received Christ in the past year. What a blessing to see the fruit of the ministry that so many others have been investing in for the past year. Before they were baptized, we gathered all the kids together to explain to them the significance of baptism and that it was a proclamation and celebration of the saving work that God had already done in their lives. The 8 kids who got baptized were the oldest of the Sozo kids, so it was really cool to see them make public their decision to follow Christ in front of all of the younger Sozo kids. What a powerful example to see their older brothers and sisters make such a huge and awesome decision.

                After baptizing the kids, we all went out to lunch because we were several hours away from home. At lunch, one of our boys, Hakeem, asked John for 200 shillings (approximately 8 cents). John said sure, but why do you need it? Hakeem told him that there was a street boy across the road that he saw and he wanted to help him out.  John gave Hakeem 2,000 shillings and watched Hakeem walk up to the boy, put the money in his pocket and give him a hug. When John shared with us what Hakeem had done, I was amazed.  Even though Hakeem did not have the immediate resources to help the street boy, he was not deterred from helping the boy and went as far as to ask others to get involved in order to do what God had placed on his heart to do, even something so small and seemingly insignificant.  I think this example set by Hakeem has huge implications on how we should live our lives and respond to various situations that the Lord presents before us.

                As John was telling me about what Hakeem had done, I watched another street boy sit down at one of our tables and start eating some of the food we had ordered. The boy was starving (literally, despite how we typically use the term) and he quickly devoured the food. We noticed there were 3 more street boys watching from the side, and he told us that they were his friends and they would beat him up when he went back to them because he would have eaten and they would still be hungry. So we called them over and ordered them three plates of food and three waters. A couple of our older Sozo boys came over and started talking to the street boys in Luganda. We found out all of their names and stories and we watched in amazement as Esau (who had just been baptized an hour earlier) conversed with the street boys. He kneeled beside them and talked with them for almost thirty minutes, not hesitating to witness to them and instruct them to stick together on the streets and take care of one another, like brothers. We were yet again encouraged and spurred on in our faiths by Esau, an 11-year old orphan, who has certainly not forgotten the desperate situation that he also came from before coming to Sozo, as he willingly befriended and sought out these street boys. I could not think of a more powerful way in which we could have witnessed Esau demonstrate his faith through his actions. By the end, there were 6 street boys that were being fed, physically and spiritually.

               We were so thankful for the ways in which God blessed us on Saturday by allowing us to be a part of and witness the amazing work that he is doing in the lives of these orphans. While many people here in Uganda overlook and take advantage of the orphans and children, viewing them as nuisances, the Lord’s grace and favor upon these children are undeniable as he is raising them up to be leaders and witnesses for Christ in their nation.  These children are certainly not forgotten, as I know my heavenly father loves them so deeply, and when I look at them I see Jesus.

Life in the Midst of Death

Make sure to read my last post before reading this update on Constance! 

After the long day, Constance was able to spend the night with me, which I was very glad about. I knew she would be safe and get some much needed rest and food while also starting her medication for the HIV and pneumonia. When my team met for worship, prayer and sharing time Wednesday night, everyone wanted an update on Constance and expected to hear that from me since I had been with her all day. Despite the obvious need for me to tell about how the day had been or what I had experienced, I had no words. I literally could not think of anything that I could say that would describe the news I had heard and the work the Lord was doing in my own heart. I knew it was still too soon for me to say anything about the day, because I had not processed it and there was still so much running through my head and the Lord was still doing so much in my heart. So I remained silent. I wondered, though, what I would say to people about the day and how I would even go about communicating the whole ordeal. The Lord faithfully showed me exactly what it was that would stand out through the whole situation and what would be most important to share. 

I slept in the room with Constance so she would not get scared or feel alone, especially in light of the circumstances. I was not able to sleep on and off throughout the night, so I just prayed over her for healing and for strength in the days ahead. She woke me up at 6:30 and I took her into the living room and we sat together on the couch. I didn’t really know what to do with her because it was so early and no one else was up and it seemed too early to eat breakfast, so I got a Bible and we started reading scripture together. 

We started in Ephesians, because she said it was her favorite book. I asked if she wanted to start in chapter 1 and she said no, but she did want to read Chapter 6 because she it was her favorite chapter and she wanted to start in verse 1 because it was also her favorite verse. Now, if you are anything like me (it is very possible and even likely that you aren’t), then this passage would seem very familiar to you because a) you went to Sunday School every week growing up and it was read nearly every week and b) you were a strong-willed/rebellious child so it was one of the verses that you were most often pointed to during a punishment, because you had failed to follow its instruction. Whatever the case, as Constance continued to narrow the focus of what verse she wanted to read, I was thinking “Surely, she will not chose to read the verse that talks about obeying your parents.” Sure enough, she did. I was shocked by this first of all because this was a verse that I avoided as much as possible as a child and teenager because it brought conviction that I often did not want to receive and second because she is an orphan, meaning she is without parents to obey. I was so puzzled that out of all of the verses in the Bible, this was her favorite one, a verse that instructed her to honor someone who she doesn’t even have in her life.  I couldn’t believe that she would intentionally read a verse that seemed like it would bring so much pain and simply remind her of her pitiful state. But that’s just what I realized; she longs to have parents in order that she can fulfill that commandment. Even though her father is dead (from AIDS) and her mother abandoned her, she longs to have loving parents, just the way the Lord intended it to be. Yet another reminder to me of what how fallen this world is…

We went through the whole chapter and I asked her where else she wanted to read. She told me John 1, so we went through that chapter, which not only went through Christ coming to earth, but also explained how we are adopted as children of God, different from a natural birth (vs 12-13). We discussed this passage in depth and it was such a joy to be able to explain to her that even though she doesn’t have earthly parents, she has a heavenly father whose love for her never falters. It was also so cool to be able to confirm that she does have an active and personal relationship with Jesus. We ended our time that morning by praying together. As I sat holding her hands, I was amazed to hear this 15 year old girl pray for healing in her own body and yet again the Lord was increasing my faith even more. 

Our time together that morning was sweet and sacred as we talked of how we both knew our souls were secured eternally in Christ. I thank God for the precious time He gave me with Constance and I praise Him for his triumph over the grave that even in the midst of a debilitating disease that brings death, Constance has found Life eternal!

Faith that Moves Mountains…and heals bodies

Wednesday morning I went to one of the boarding schools where we have been doing ministry. When I got there, I inquired where Constance was. Constance is a 15 year old girl that the Lord has unmistakably put in my life and my family’s life. When my mom came here a few weeks ago, she had the chance to spend some time with Constance while she was sick. Since then my mom and dad have been praying about sponsoring her and finally decided that they will. During the past few weeks I have been able to spend several afternoons a week with Constance playing sports, doing relays, and just having fun. For about a month now Constance has been sick and had been diagnosed with Typhoid, Malaria, and an upper respiratory infection, all of which were misdiagnoses. So when I didn’t see her with all the other school children, I became concerned. One of the other girls told me that she was in the dorms and was sick. I found her in a dark room full of bunk beds. She was clearly very ill and not her normal bubbly self. 

I took her to the local doctor where I also took Vivian a few weeks ago  (You know it’s a bad thing when the accountant at the doctor asks you what your name is simply because he has noticed that you have been coming regularly). I had her tested for TB and Malaria. When the doctor asked about HIV, Constance said that she had been tested before and it was negative. I asked if she was sure and suggested that maybe we test again just to be sure and have it in her records. The doctor agreed but said that it was Constance’s decision to make since I was only her caretaker, not a parent. Constance agreed that it would be a good thing to test just as a precaution. After doing the blood work and waiting for some time, the doctor called us back into the room. Malaria and TB tests came back negative. HIV test came back positive. I was shocked and thought I had misunderstood the doctor with her accent. My eyes darted back and forth from the doctor to Constance as I tried to read the expressions on their faces to see if I had heard right. After one glance at Constance I knew I had heard the doctor correctly. Constance’s eyes were glazed over and she was completely stunned. What had just been a precautionary test to back up previous ones conducted had now resulted in life-altering and devastating news. She was shocked and overwhelmed and so was I. I tried to comfort her as we both held back tears. I had to keep telling myself that I had to be strong for her. How was I supposed to comfort her if I let her see how this news was more than I could comprehend or process at that moment?

The rest of the day was spent going to and from different doctors to get tests done. She had been sick for about a month because the HIV had suppressed her immune system, allowing her to slowly form a bad case of pneumonia, which is what the latter tests ended up revealing. She clung to me for the rest of the day. I cannot even imagine how she was feeling. How does a girl with no family (at least family that cares) process and handle the news that she has HIV?

Allen, Sherry and I prayed over Constance. Allen and Suzanne both prayed that God would heal Constance and cleanse her blood. During the prayer, my own blatant disbelief caught me off guard and deeply troubled my soul. Throughout the rest of the day, I struggled to believe that God could really heal her and cleanse her blood of HIV if he wanted to. I wrestled with God. I wanted so desperately for her to be healed, but I lacked the faith that the God of the Old Testament was still able and willing to perform healing miracles in this day and age and especially in a situation so personal and visible for me to witness. I am broken and burdened over my lack of faith. For the first time, instead of judging Peter, I really related to him when I thought of the story in the Bible where he sank into the water, because he did not have full faith in Jesus.

Simply praying for a miracle to happen is a radically different thing from praying for the Lord to perform a miracle and then believing and expecting it to happen. Maybe this is a very simple and obvious statement which you have learned many years ago, but the Lord revealed this truth to me and it was a painful process of me yet again being brought face to face with my sin which is so distasteful and insulting to my Lord. I thank Jesus for his grace which never fails and which covers over all my sin when I come to him and repent. Jesus proved himself almighty in my life Wednesday by convicting me of my doubting and lack of faith and by finally giving me the faith that he will indeed heal Constance’s body completely if it is his will. I am still waiting to see if this will be his will for Constance or not, and I trust, I really do trust that his will is best, whether she be healed or not.